raising strong girls · slice of life

I wonder where it is…

Things enter our house and disappear all of the time. And by disappear, I don’t mean I misplace them. I’m quite good at keeping track of everything, thank you very much. Things go “missing” on purpose because I don’t want them in our house.

That’s right. I relocate anything that’s princess or that perpetuates negative female images. For instance, Isabelle recently attended a birthday party. She returned home with a goody bag full of princess items and stickers of cartoon character girls that had low cut tops and sexy clothes. Do you know where all of those items went? In the garbage while she was asleep. Did she notice? Of course! She looked for them the following morning. “Where are the stickers?” she asked, noticing they were no longer in the spot she left them. “I’m not sure,” I replied. “I wonder…” And that’s it. Within two minutes she was on to the next thing and had forgotten about the stickers. Score one small victory for mom.

Presents are a whole other thing. We’re coming up on the holiday season and her birthday. This means questionable items (READ: Items I don’t approve of her playing with) are going to be given to her. I hate to make things disappear, but I probably will. These items will be donated to the children’s hospital where I know other kids will appreciate them. After all, I’m one of the people who crowd-sourced the Lamilly doll (Ours arrives this week!), so it’s unlikely I’ll allow something like Barbie (which I played with as a child) to enter this house. I can’t shield her from the things she sees out in the world or plays with at school, but in our house I have the power to control what comes in and stays in. At least for now.


9 thoughts on “I wonder where it is…

  1. In my child-raising days, the biggest problem was later when my kids spent the night with a friend & they were allowed to watch any kind of movie. It was tough to manage, & soon enough I didn’t allow them to spend the night. Keep going, it isn’t easy.

  2. It is always good to know I’m not the only mom who does this sort of thing. I’m fierce about candy. My daughter is especially prone to cavities, so Halloween or holiday candy – usually only one or two pieces make the cut. I know it’s less tempting and I’m saving her teeth. But am encouraged to read your post to know its her health at stake. Not my popularity.

    1. Thanks for that. It’s nice to know there are others out there like me. (The candy disappears around here too… but it usually goes to the two of us.) And I don’t care about being popular either. I care about her future mental and physical health.

      1. It’s possible to have sons who do not play with toy weapons – we need to embrace our roles as parents and stand guard over their hearts and minds, as long as we can.

  3. Ugh, tough job, Stacey. I second Betsy’s comment – beliefs are worth fighting for. Things disappear around here, too. I also act surprised and a little disbelieving. Sometimes, just for fun, I help them look for the missing item for a bit. 🙂

  4. I love the last line, at least for now. It’s hard to stay the course and there will be bumps along the way. I never bought a Barbie doll but many were given to my girls over the years and we kept them. I didn’t like them but a friend said to me once you can’t completely shelter them, they’ll be socially clueless. You’ll have moments that for now works and moments where you have to stretch it and realize there are bigger issues on the horizon.

    It was great to see you and connect at the slicer dinner. Thanks for organizing.

  5. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to be a parent. An observation from someone on the sidelines…I admire you for following through on your beliefs and doing what’s best for your daughter!

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